One Year Later: Reflecting On The Blessing Of Adoption

Today marks exactly one year since we finalized the adoption of our sweet littlest girl and became her forever family! We spent the day at church and with family, celebrating the life we’ve been entrusted to care for. {If you haven’t read our adoption story, definitely check it out HERE!}

I love that her adoption just happened to have fallen in November, which is also National Adoption Month: It almost feels like we get to celebrate for a whole month instead of just one day, ha! The past year has definitely been easier on our hearts than the first year (before the adoption.)

Letting the reality sink in that everything is permanent certainly lifted a burden from our shoulders! Even though it’s only been a year, occasionally I already forget how hard some of those first several months were going back and forth between reunification with birth mom seeming very possible and out of the question. Nothing is ever promised or certain as a foster parent. There are always so many unknowns, and things can always change in an instant.  

 

 

We’ve chosen to be very open about the adoption with our kids – I cannot imagine hiding it (especially since there’s a 4 month difference between our youngest two ha!) Sometimes I worry about when the questions will come. Questions about what birth parents were like, or why they couldn’t keep her. Questions that don’t come with easy answers. And I know there’s the potential someday she might even want to seek one or both of them out. I have to choose to live in the now and take things as they come… tomorrow has enough worry of its own.

Defining “family” can be a funny thing. One of my favorite Instagram hashtags I’ve come across is #LoveMakesAFamily. I know it means a lot of different things to different people, but to me it’s just a beautiful way of saying family is so far beyond genetics. For instance, in our own life, we have people related to us by blood who seemingly we could be quite close to, but who have chosen to keep us out of their lives.

Rejection by those who you feel should be a part of your life is so so difficult…

 

 

But family goes so far beyond blood relations: We have connected with some of the most meaningful the people in our lives through so many different paths, including our own adoption. {Don’t hear me wrong though, we have a LOT of awesome “blood-relatives” as well!} All that to say, I hope our little girl grows up knowing how much we love and care for her, and that as she grows older it’s enough to outweigh feeling different or rejected. But there is no adoption without loss. And I know I cannot, and should not, take those questions and feelings away.

For now, we continue to take each day as it comes, the blessings and hurts. We’re really still just getting started in this whole journey, and I am so grateful for the life we have been called to!